Okay, let’s be fair about this. You could argue that the U.S. had a legitimate interest in propping up global oil prices during the COVID-caused 2020 recession in order to aid domestic producers. I figured I’d be fair at the outset because MAGAs never are, particularly when it comes to this issue. They seem to think gas prices are high right now because Joe Biden decided to press the big red “Evil” button on the Resolute Desk, ensuring that gas became prohibitively expensive, baby’s blood smoothies were sold at cost at every Jamba Juice, and something-something George Soros.
Couldn’t have anything to do with a global economic recovery that sent prices soaring pretty much across the board worldwide. Nah. Must be Biden and his blackhearted anti-American schemes. After all, this would have never happened under Trump! Possibly because half the country would have put themselves in suspended-animation pods for four years had he won, seriously depressing energy demand—as well as any marginally cogent person who wasn’t in a suspended-animation pod.
Of course, no one likes high gas prices, but the main reason they were so low during Trump’s last year in office is that the economy was a collapsed shit souffle. Does anyone really want to go back to that?
Meanwhile, we have a much more plausible answer for why gas prices are high right now. While he was pr*sident, Donald Trump pressured the Saudis into cutting production in order to elevate the price of crude. An April 30, 2020, Reuters story provides the context:
As the United States pressed Saudi Arabia to end its oil price war with Russia, President Donald Trump gave Saudi leaders an ultimatum.
In an April 2 phone call, Trump told Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman that unless the Organization of the Petroleum Exporting Countries (OPEC) started cutting oil production, he would be powerless to stop lawmakers from passing legislation to withdraw U.S. troops from the kingdom, four sources familiar with the matter told Reuters.
The threat to upend a 75-year strategic alliance, which has not been previously reported, was central to the U.S. pressure campaign that led to a landmark global deal to slash oil supply as demand collapsed in the coronavirus pandemic – scoring a diplomatic victory for the White House.
Why did the Trump administration’s few “victories” all seem to help Vladimir Putin more than our own people? Since Russia produces little more than fossil fuels and foolish fossils, it had a keen interest in buoying oil prices during the recession. And unlike, say, providing basic health information to the nation’s citizens during a deadly pandemic without sounding like a drunk howler monkey getting a hot Brazilian wax on a Tilt-A-Whirl, this is a task Trump somehow managed not to fuck up. Hmm, wonder why.
Oh, and not for nothing, Trump pulled us out of the Iranian nuclear deal in 2018 because of his searing hatred for President Obama, and in the process, he took millions of barrels of crude off the global market.
Now Biden is hoping to bring down the gas prices that Trump raised, both intentionally and through his boundless bumblefuckery. He’s asked Saudi Arabia to pump more oil, but they’re sticking to their guns—presumably because they want infinite mulligans when it comes to gruesomely dismembering innocent journalists.
Of course, the global oil markets are volatile and complex, so blaming any single individual for the price of gas is pretty silly. But since Republicans are seeing fit to hammer Biden on this issue, it behooves us to fight back with the facts—and the fact remains that Donald Trump raised prices on U.S. consumers in 2020 to help Vladimir Putin, Russia, and ExxonMobil, et al.
So if you really want to blame a president for the current inflated price of gas—well, maybe you should blame that fucking guy.
It made comedian Sarah Silverman say, “THIS IS FUCKING BRILLIANT,” and prompted author Stephen King to shout “Pulitzer Prize!!!” (on Twitter, that is). What is it? The viral letter that launched four hilarious Trump-trolling books. Get them all, including the finale, Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump, at this link. Or, if you prefer a test drive, you can download the epilogue to Goodbye, Asshat for the low, low price of FREE.
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