If Milquetoast Mike Pence—the guy who puts the “mouse” in pusillanimous—is the universally acclaimed avatar of GOP cowardice, then Mike’s brother Greg is the avatar’s juice-box-sipping vestigial twin.
On Jan. 6, 2021, Greg was rushed out of the Capitol with his brother as a bloodthirsty mob shouted, “Hang Mike Pence!” Now, as four convicted Capitol rioters attempt to reenter the Capitol without smashing windows, bashing heads, or trashing the Constitution (i.e., they’re running for Congress), Greg seems oddly ambivalent about the attempted extrajudicial executions of close family members.
Informed that one of the most notorious insurrectionists—the Viking-hatted Jacob Chansley—is running for Congress this election cycle, the elder Pence, a Congress member from Indiana, simply said, “I’ll be darned, huh. It’s up to his constituents.” Well, gee, maybe he’d be more upset if an unmarried woman had succeeded in playing footsies with his brother before Mother could show up to chaperone. Then again, why should he be different than any other Dear Leader-exalting MAGA Republican?
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